Hey there, you. It’s been awhile.
I’ve been taking a little break from blogging and social media-ing (although I’m not really a social media person in the first place), and YUP, you guessed why—
COMPASSION FATIGUE MAN.
If you’re like me then you might be an empath, people pleaser, (like to think) a force of kindness. It’s difficult because I will always stand by it is the right choice to choose kindness. But what happens when that means sacrificing your own needs? When is it too much to handle? When are we supposed to set boundaries?
Well I’m not perfect either and I’m trying to figure it out, but here’s what I’ve learned so far.
My five best tips when you are suffering from compassion fatigue, burn out, exhaustion of too much giving:
- Put yourself in that #1 slot. Although this may feel counterintuitive to being an empath, you can’t help people without boundaries. You can’t help people to the fullest extent if you aren’t actively trying to help yourself. Recognize the importance of putting yourself first and owning that is OKAY. Try more self care, therapy, exercise, fueling your body with good food, time alone, new hobbies. Do things that are good for you and your emotional cup will start to refill.
- Support systems. Simple, but not always easy. Surround yourself with people that you can get support from. Lean into those relationships and be VULNERABLE. Uncomfortable? Yeah, you’re doing it right then. This article explains more about how to practice being vulnerable.
- Breaks are good and encouraged. You can’t always be perfect and you can’t always please others. Practice saying no. Practice setting stronger boundaries with others (and yourself). Take a day off to do something solely for you and your inner child. Foster fun for your inner child. Cause it might seem cheesy, but we’ve all got one and it needs to be positively fueled.
- Let it be. You can’t control it all, so learning to let it be is a critical lesson (that I myself am no where near mastering).
- Look out for the universe nudges. I’m not sure what your religious or spiritual beliefs are, but across most, people believe in destiny, signs, intuition, coincidences. I don’t care what you call it, but try opening yourself up to the fact that maybe you are being nudged by the universe. Listen to your gut and cherish what its telling you.
I hope this helps! Always here if you need me.
Rachel Cohen, LCSW is the owner and therapist at Seaside Counseling Center in Jacksonville Beach, FL. Rachel works with lonely, frustrated, and overwhelmed teens, 20 somethings, and perinatal mamas online and in-person.